Saturday, February 13, 2010

Battle of the sexes

I wrote this story for a small design publication a few years ago and my rep at the time thought that it made me sound like a spoiled brat.  I am not spoiled or a brat and I did not grow up with a silver spoon in my mouth.  So as we approach Valentine's Day please read this short story and try not to judge me.  It was meant to be funny and show how sometimes as a stylist and designer a little groveling goes along way.
This is a story, a true story in fact. However, the names have been changed to protect the innocent. We will start this story about twenty years ago when a young couple decided to spend the rest of their lives together in wedded bliss (well, most of the time). The wife of this story is an interior designer and stylist and the husband owns a recruiting agency. Let’s call the husband Matt….a little background might be helpful…Matt comes from a family of eleven brothers and sisters. All turned out to be lovely people. Coming from such a large family, function and practicality were rule of the day. The term interior designer was never mentioned in this household. In fact looking at photos of Matt’s life the same plaid couch shows up in every picture, from birth to graduation. Needless to say this couple comes to this marriage with very different ideas of what a house should look like. They do however agree on the basis of love being the most important element of a home. As an interior designer the wife, we’ll call her Kelly, has always felt that her house should reflect her style and talents. Over the years Kelly noticed that Matt started to refer to furniture as the” F” word .He did not look kindly on anything considered” NOT PRACTICAL”. His complaints became constant about the many bruises he endured from newly placed furniture moved/appearing with out his knowledge or consent. So when Kelly decided years ago that she would like to remove the upper cabinets in the kitchen and replace them with open shelving the suggestion went about as far as the next period of this sentence. Over the years though, she would bring this up and at times seemed to be getting somewhat of a favorable response… she clung to this. After many favors and ok, some groveling, the open shelving idea came to fruition. Not in the kitchen but in a small adjoining room off the kitchen. Some might call this a closet, but I… (I mean Kelly) had decided to call it the extension to the kitchen. Victory you say…not so fast. The volleying still continues with this couple…Basketball court vs. closet organizers, pool tables vs. window treatments. I’d like to say that this couple lived happily ever after but the jury is still out and for now Kelly is content with her open shelving. Now if only she can convince him to put hardwood floors in the bedroom she’d be really happy. The end.

31 comments:

Linda said...

It's a constant struggle, isn't it!? I want to re-do my entryway, my husband says I just did it (it was 9 years ago...). LOL enjoyed this post!

slip4 said...

Chuckled reading this post. A very common situation I believe. Love your blog...

Judi said...

I'm with you...I thought your article was meant to be funny and it was! Too bad that some people just don't have a sense of humor...what would a publication rep know anyway!? haha
~judi ;)
from the1829farmhouse.blogspot.com

Deb said...

There are a lot of men out there who just don't get it or are just not interested. Marriage is about compromise and you should both be able to give and take. I don't call that being spoiled at all, everyone wants a nice home especially when you're in the business!
Good luck and don't give up!

Laura said...

Cute and funny and oh so true....
Great post!
Happy Valentine's Day!
:) Laura

Rachel said...

I would love hardwood floors in the bedroom...my husband is coming around to the idea. :) Happy Valentine's Day.

An Urban Cottage said...

Bratty? A little. Sexist? Quite a bit.

Kifus said...

Great post Kelly! Those open shelves look awesome and let us know when you win the battle of your bedroom floor!

Now Kelly, it's Valentine's day so go kiss your hubby and sweetly tell him that everything you do, you do it for him!

Happy Valentine!!

Sharon said...

If something has never been a priority, it is difficult to make it one.

I'm sure you both compromise on more than decorating ... and I'm sure he is more than happy when each of your decorating visions is complete.

the gardeners cottage said...

Very funny and clever too. LOVE the photo. Just brilliant and beautiful. Please come to my house and work your magic!

~janet

C.J. said...

It is not so great when a couple cannot agree on the furniture, decorating, etc. I figure it this way, I am the woman, I am the one with design sense, I am the one who cleans this house with no help, and if I want to change things or buy something new (with my own money) then the MR. better get used to it. If that is considered sexist, demanding and one way, OH WELL.
The funny part of this issue is that I have been wanting to change my living room into a shabby chic look. I started yesterday...

Janine Marshall said...

Hi Kelly,

I enjoyed this short story and I agree with the above comments that some people don't have a sense of humour!! I don't think it's bratty at all, I think it's taking a look at an issue that most couples have to deal with. Love the pictures today of your open shelving etc., they look so good. To me this goes with the business that you are in......the home is a way of expressing yourself and finding inspiration within your four walls. Enjoy the rest of your week.
Take care.
Janine
XXOO
Tasmania, Australia

Dreamy Whites said...

Dear Kelly
I love this story. My husband has thought all these years that I was the only person in the world that wakes up each morning and wants to change things around a bit.
Your photos are so beautiful.
Take Care,
Maria

Ness Lockyer said...

I am with you Kelly!
I painted our living room white, he seen it happening, waited until I finished THEN said 'I dont like it' and I painted it back to what he thought was the original colour. What he doesnt know is that it is a totally different shade, closer to what I wanted =0)

I am forever changing things around and he keeps up by reading my blog at work!
Love the kitchen shot, beautiful.
Ness xx

FEDERICA said...

I just found your blog and I'm so in love with all your works! You are really talented! Unfortunately I live in Italy...too far from you!
I'm planning a post about you on my blog :-)
Hugs
Federica

DustyLu said...

Just found your blog! So glad I did..its fantastic..off to browse! ~lulu

mimi charmante said...

Spoiled? You sound like a typical wife to me - this wife anyway...
I have added you to my blog roll as I am always looking for fabulous inspiration! Thanks to Ness for introducing me to you!
bisous

The Design Notebook said...

Just came across your blog and I love it!!

Julienne said...

Well haven't you picked up some newbies today! I'm another and I enjoyed your story. But...wouldn't life be boring if we always got our own way!

Mara said...

Loved this story! And I love your works too! I have posted some of your fantastic pictures on my blog:
http://home-shabby-home.blogspot.com
I am at the very beginning (just 2 posts!); I talk about the building of my new home and your blog and site are great inspiration for me!

Carol said...

After 40 years together my husband just rolls his eyes when he bumps into things. I too have to put ideas in his head and let them "percolate" until he finds he likes the idea of a change.

It isn't just my house. My principal dropped by the other day and saw that I had once again changed my classroom arrangement. He laughed and said that I change my room more than any teacher on campus. Fortunately he likes visiting my room and middle school students like it when I change it up.

Good luck with your next change!

Hillcrest Acres said...

I just found your blog and love it. The photos are beautiful and inspirational!!

Have a great day!!

Jennifer Rizzo said...

That sounds like my house.. my hubby said the most dreaded words in our home is where I look around and say "you know what I'm thinking...."

Shelbie said...

Hi I found your blog through My Sweet Savannah, and I'm so happy I did! Love your style and I think you take great photos! I'm glad I found this place!
Thanks!

Room Service ~ Decorating 101 said...

Just found your blog, love it! Thanks for sharing.

Barb said...

Ha! I'm glad I'm not alone. My husband's mantra has become: cute is not comfortable. (This happened after we spent a weekend in a darling little cabin on a lake, where the only "easy chairs" were Adirondack chairs. And yeah, I had to admit that after awhile these particular Adirondacks weren't comfortable. But dang, they were cute, so who cares?)

Anyway, I feel your pain. And I, too, have to move ever-so-slowly when suggesting "radical" changes to the decor.

Love your shelving...and love your style. I just found your blog today and realized that you had styled some of my favorite rooms from magazines, rooms that have been ripped out and pasted into my Idea Files. (In fact, I think these rooms might be from your home...the room with the twin beds and the red and white quilts, the old fashioned stadium or theater seating with the pull-down map behind them. That is one of my all-time favorite rooms.)

Jenni @ nest to keep said...

Oh my goodness! I could have written this post, almost word for word. (Except for the part about us being married for 20 years, because I've only been married for 13!) We are re-modeling our kitchen, and I did not "win" the open-shelving-replacing-the-cupboards debate BUT am getting some open shelves on the other side of the kitchen! I am glad you were able to get open shelving in the room right outside of the kitchen, and they look gorgeous! Good luck with the hardwoods in the bedroom idea...I am thinking this is an even more difficult thing to manage than the open shelving! :)

P.S. I love your blog! AND your decorating style, too! :)

annie said...

It sometimes is a battle--- I wage mine silently and patiently.
I have learned (with nearly 37 yrs. under my belt and over it.
..never mind) that I sweetly present my BRILLIANT and NECESSARY idea and then wait...and wait....and wait....and wait...and sometimes wait some more, but eventually, e-v-e-n-t-u-a-l-l-y my not so well received idea becomes AMAZING!!
OR, if I'm just darn tired of waiting, I get a hammer and do it myself!
annie

Iowa Girl said...

I guess "spoiled" has been redefined as knowing what you want and a lot of us fall into that category. I'm not even telling my husband about my next "project" until all of the decisions have been made and veto power is not an option. :-)

sanjeet said...

A very common situation I believe. Love your blog...
home jobs india

Robyn said...

In my opinion your agent had it all wrong. Is he a man? It sounds very "tongue in cheek" not "silver spoon in mouth" to me! I LOVED the article. So. There. ;-)